A nice, long entry

I've decided to write you all a nice long blog entry, prewritten in a notebook to avoid being rushed at the internet cafe. I've only been gone for a week, but it feels like it's been years since I've really spoken to anyone-maybe because I've had so much to say. It's amazing how much life can change in a week! If this was a vacation or a short trip, I wouldn't feel any compulsion to call everyone I know just to say hello, and homesickness would be a laughable idea. But this isn't a vacation. I will be living here for the next 26 months, with very little hope of going home to visit or having anyone visit me here. I'm doing fine right now, but every day, mostly at night, I get waves of anticipatory homesickness. You can say I knew what I was getting myself into when I applied, and of course I did. I just didn't know how long 26 months would seem at the end of the first week. I can't make any promises that I can do this, and I hope that if at some point I decide that it's too much and I need to come home, that everyone who supported me in coming here will understand and not be too disappointed in me. There is absolutely no way you can prepare for this experience, and no way of knowing how you will feel until you're here. It's a daily, and sometimes hourly, decision to stay. That said, I am still excited to be here, I want to do this, I will do my best, and I have every intention of seeing this through. I went through a lot to get here, and I don't plan on giving up that easily. Right now, my goal is to make it through training. 8 weeks? Now that I can do!
Today was my third day with my host family, and my first without speaking to an American. I think I can safely say that I am starting to adjust. Being in the same room as my host family is no longer awkward, and I finally know all of their names (I'll introduce them all in my next entry). And I am an expert at bucket bathing. For those who think a description is too much information, skip this paragraph- but I know I had no idea what it was before I got here.
First, you heat a metal bucket of water over the fire outside to the perfect temperature. Then you transfer the water to your own personal bucket and bring it inside along with a plastic basin large enough to stand in. I bath (or bath, which is the verb here) in my bedroom, but others bath in the hut or in separate bathroom if they have one. I gather my soap, shampoo, conditioner, cup, toothbrush and toothpaste, place my bucket inside the basin, and then step into the basin myself. I wash with the a washcloth and my cup, then use the cup to dump water over my head so I can wash my hair. Before I had my cup, I dunked my whole head in the bucket, but the pouring works a lot better. Once my hair washed, I brush my teeth with water from my water bottle using the basin as a sink. Then I brush my hair and take out my contacts while my hands are clean. I get dressed, drag the basin to the backyard to dump it, put it away in the hut, and that's the end of the bucket bath. This happens every night, and if my host mom has her way, every morning, too. The best part is that this only uses one bucket full of water,and I feel completely clean. Imagine how many buckets of water we use to bathe or shower every day in the US!
Tomorrow (Monday) starts our real training, with intensive Setswana lessons, cultural field trips, and classes on HIV biology and behavior change strategy. Maybe it;s a bit nerdy, but I can't wait to dive in. Last week was a lot of logistics, procedures, and policy. Maybe now that we'll be getting into useful, applicable training, things will start to fall into place. I'll keep you updated!

A New BotsMama

I hav finally escaped from the lodge with its American amenities and large swimming pool into the village of Molepolole, where I use an outhouse and take bucket baths, but can walk to KFC. Go figure. I'm at an internet cafe and don't have much time left (and the connection is verrrry slow), but I'll try to run through the events of the last couple days. Wednesday was a full day of training, full of Setswana lessons and vaccines, and ending with a fancy dinner with the American ambassador to Botswana and the filming of a music video. Yes, that's right, our lodge was the filming location of Slyzer's newest music video. Slyzer, in case you were wondering, is one of the most popular musicians here. Every kid knows her name. It was crazy. Thursday was our last day of training at the lodge, and we of course ended it with a celebration in the hotel bar (don't worry, we didn't get too crazy). It's amazing how close we've gotten as a group in such a short time. It sounds weird,but now that we're all living apart with different families, I'll be looking forward to our long days of training classes together.
Yesterday was one of the strangest, most exciting days of my life. We checked out of the hotel early, and met in a hall in Molepolole, where the ceremoy to match us with our host families took place. There was a LOT of singing and praying and ululating (look it up), and at the end, we all had new Bots-mamas (and dads and siblings and grandparents and cousins and so forth). When I got to my new home, I was immediately integrated into the family,and cooked dinner and washed dishes with my new 12 year old sister. I was introduced to the concepts of bucket baths and using an outhouse, which I'll talk more about later. Everyone went to sleep early,and I was left in my new room wondering what the heck I've gotten myself into. However, everyone has been very nice and welcoming, and I am much more optimistic today. And Africa is beautiful. I'll post some photos when I can (which will most likely be in 2 months when I get my laptop back).
Ok, time is up. I'll try to get back on soon!

Disembarkation in Africa!!

***Note: I tried to post this yesterday (Monday), but my laptop battery died. I'll update for real as soon as I can get it fully charged.***

3 hour car ride from Long Island to Philadelphia
5 hours of staging lectures and ice breakers
6 hours of no sleep and literally no room at the inn (Holiday Inn, actually)
2.5 hour bus ride from Philly to JFK, leaving at 2am
5 hours of waiting for the flight at JFK (and our flight left on time)
15 hour flight from JFK to Johannesburg, South Africa by airbus
8 hour layover in Johannesburg
45 minute flight from Johannesburg to Gaborone, South Africa
20 minute bus ride from the airport to the Big 5 Lodge, where we will be staying for the first few nights before we move in with our host families.
I think that's enough traveling for quite some time, don't you?
Anyway, Africa is great so far, beautiful weather, beautiful African sunset, and really nice people. I'll be in the lodge til Friday, hopefully I can update again before I leave!

Packing List, Last Night Shenanigans, and Leaving New York

I am currently sitting in a hotel room in Philadelphia. The lights are out, my family is all asleep, and it's 3am, but I am wide awake and determined to get as much computer time in while I still have reliable internet. The last couple days have been a blur. Wednesday was the last day of AYM for me, which wasn't as bad as I thought it might be. We had a party, and the kids talked about school and who knows what else while Katie and Kevin and I conducted an in-depth Lost discussion, and we ended with a few words about service and a discussion about the future of the parish and youth group. After youth group, I ended up at Friendly's with my mom, her best friend, one of their friends, and my aunt, and some goodbyes were said. Thursday involved a lot of shopping and running around, and I honestly don't remember a lot of it. I do remember that I spent a good portion of a family dinner in the parking lot of Chili's, mainly because the choice between a caesar salad or a chicken sandwich was obviously cause for immediate, uncontrollable sobbing and semi-hysterical phone calls to amazingly understanding friends. It's funny, dinner choice has never been so emotional before! Thursday ended (and Friday began) with a 3 bar extravaganza with Dawn, a friend since elementary school days, and my brother Kevin. Many drinks, some dancing, and what I'm convinced were totally awesome karaoke renditions of "Hey Jude" and Alanis Morissette's "Uninvited" were involved.
Friday morning came a little too soon, and I was thrown out of bed only a few hours after arriving home. Shopping, shopping, and more shopping followed, along with a goodbye lunch with my dad, and the evening ended with a packing frenzy. We finally, finally left the house at about 9:30pm, and got to Philadelphia 3 hours later- and here we are! For those wondering, the enormity of the situation still has not really hit me, despite my parking lot panic. Maybe it never will?
Anyway, it may finally be time for bed. I'll leave you with the packing list, and next time I post here, it will be from Africa!!!

Carry- On (Regular size backpack)
 Laptop
 Scrapbook
 Wallet
 Skirt
 Dress shirt
 Change of underwear/socks
 Medication (Exedrin, Immodium, Motrin, Benadryl)
 Ipod with wire
 Extra flashdrives
 Toothbrush
 Important paperwork
 Cell phone
 Glasses/ contact case
 Singulair/ Inhaler
 Digital camera with wire
 Address book
 Dayplanner
 Journal/ Quotebook

Rolling Duffel Bag (Training)
 Sleeping Bag
 Skirt
 Khakis
 Socks
 Underwear/Bras
 Short sleeve blouses
 Long sleeve shirt
 Shoes (Keen, flats)
 Flip-flops
 Alarm clock
 Debrox
 Notebook
 Pens/Pencils
 Markers/ Crayons
 Index cards
 Headlamp
 Pajama pants
 T shirt
 Fleece Jacket
 Leggings (for layering)
 Makeup
 Soap
 Shampoo/ Conditioner
 Toothbrush (extra)/Toothpaste
 Feminine products
 Rechargeable Batteries
 First Aid Kit
 Towel
 Razor
 Deodorant
 Body lotion
 Q tips
 Bobby pins
 Anti-frizz solution
 Hair ties
 Contact solution
 Water bottle

Backpacking size backpack (For site)
 Deodorant (extra)
 Shampoo/conditioner (extra)
 School supply type things
 Duck tape
 Contact solution (extra)
 Body lotion (extra)
 Books
– A Wrinkle in Time
– The Bible
– The Lord of the Rings
– Mere Christianity
– The Weather of the Heart
– The Alchemist
– Pride and Prejudice
 Seasoning/ spices
 Ziploc bags
 Decorations for site
 Bathing suit
 Sewing kit
 Can opener
 Lighters
 Swiss Army knife

It's getting real!

      I know I promised a packing list, but one generally has to have started packing for that to happen.  And of course, being the master procrastinator that I am, I haven't started packing, nor have I even finished shopping for all my stuff.  My room is a disaster, I have boxes strewn throughout my mom's basement, and I have less than 4 days. Awesome.  I'm not worried though.  With great procrastinating power comes great responsibility, and I have learned that I work best under pressure.  It'll all get done because it has to get done, and having lunch with a friend or watching Lost and then a Yankee game instead of packing will not keep it from happening.
      The goodbyes have begun for real.  They started for real last Wednesday, when I spent an amazing day in New Paltz with the friends there.  In 12 hours, we managed to take advantage of almost everything New Paltz has to offer, which is actually a lot for little hippie college town.  I arrived at 9am, and met Kristen at the Muddy Cup for coffee (first goodbye), drove out to the Hudson Valley Lab to say goodbye to Anne and everyone there, wandered around Water Street and tried on skirts at the Himalayan store while someone woke up and got ready, and then met Megan to begin the real adventures.  Megan came equipped with a broken car to be dropped off, and a to-do list that reached epic proportions.  List items included:

- Tickling frogs in the waters around the abandoned cement mines of Rosendale (no swimming!)

- Attempting to break into the pretty church in Rosendale without looking suspicious

-  Trespassing to get to the waterfall in High Falls, where there is also "No Swimming", just in case you were tempted to take a dip in the freezing, rocky rapids (which we totally weren't....)

- Eating lunch at the Egg's Nest, a favorite restaurant of mine with tasty food and bright, kitschy, and generally indescribable decor, while completely weirding out our waiter and setting off alarms by taking pictures of everything and reassuring him that it was okay because I am moving to Africa.

 - Taking a picture of an Africa-shaped puddle, with me pointing to Botswana

-Going on a fourth grade field trip to the D&H Canal trail, historical brochure and all, and making it through all of 3 locks before losing interest and sitting and contemplating losing our shoes to the mucky depths below

- Driveby shooting of the camera variety of Mohonk Mountain

- Not getting run over when parked in the middle of a winding mountain road to take a picture of a pretty view, which was obviously okay because I'm moving to Africa

- Visiting the church in Highland and writing intentions that won't be found til about 2013


- Buying 3 skirts for a total of $7 at Salvation Army with the help of an overenthusiastic stranger

- Echoing across Lake Minnewaska with Megan and Brittany, trespassing on private property (again), not swimming (again) and rescuing Megan from the non-trail boat ramp.  Don't ask.

- Learning that gravel thrown into a lake from a good height makes an awesome sound.


-  Ice cream at Frosty Rock, where we met Allie, who gave up ice cream for Lent.  Sorry, Allie!

- CCM meeting, where we ate pizza and learned about Haiti

After a a full and actually rather efficient day, it was finally time for goodbyes.  They went pretty well, and there may have been a cake and singing and a card, and lots of hugs, but no tears.  Once I got in my car to begin the 3 hour drive home, though, it hit me.  I'll miss seeing New Paltz and the Hudson Valley again for a couple of years, but I said my goodbyes to them when I moved back to the island in the fall.  It's the people that I will really miss, and the community that won't be there when I come back and everyone has moved on to new lives. This is what is making saying goodbye so hard.  Everyone is so fragmented already, with friends in Wales and Italy and Boston and Ohio and Long Island and New Paltz and Virginia, and I know that two years is a long time.  We can say that we'll all keep in touch and get together when I come back, but how realistic is that?  All I can do is hope that the friendships are strong enough to last and not think about it too much.
    Goodbyes have gone on from there.  On Saturday, after an afternoon of crab legs and a safari in rich people territory with my sister,  I met up with two friends from high school who were up visiting from Virginia, and had a wonderful night of chocolate fondue, wine, wandering around Port Jeff, and millions of questions.  Katie actually wrote one of the recommendations that got me into the Peace Corps, and I'll be corresponding with Tim's social studies class through WorldWise Schools, so they're stuck with me and will have to keep in touch.  No worries there.  Easter brought a new batch, mostly full of relatives.  It was tough to say goodbye to my grandparents.  None of them have the internet, so I don't know how well we'll be able to keep in touch, and two years is a long time for them, too.  We'll just have to do the best we can.  
     Tomorrow brings a whole new day of goodbyes, with my last night of AYM (the youth group I went through in high school and now volunteer at).  My class actually thought the 24th was my last night, and all the kids made a special effort to show up, and one even brought a cake, which was very sweet of them.  AYM is another thing that will be changing while I'm gone- our youth director and our pastor will be retiring in June, and no one is sure what that means for the program yet.  It's been a huge part of my life and has really made me who I am today, so I am praying that it will work out and that AYM has a great future ahead of it.
After AYM, I'll be meeting my mom, my aunt, and my mom's best friend (who may as well be another aunt) for ice cream and goodbyes.  Aside from my mother and grandmothers, Jeanine and Julie have really been the strongest women in my life, and I know I've been lucky to have them.  They've been extremely supportive of me in everything, even though they both think I'm a little more than crazy for moving to Africa, and I'll miss them a lot.
I'll probably spend at least part of Thursday running around and trying to hit up all those people I thought I'd see by now but haven't, so if I haven't gotten to you, give me a call!  I'll be leaving for Philly on Friday evening, and my mom and the kids will stay overnight at the hotel.  Registration is at noon on Saturday, staging will last until around 7pm, and then at 2am Saturday night/ Sunday morning, we get on the bus to JFK.  The flight leaves at 11:15am, and we arrive in South Africa 15 hours later.  From there, we take an hour-long flight to Gaborone, the capital of Botswana, and then a bus to a lodge there, where we will spend a few days of orientation.  Then we move into our host family housing and begin 3 months of training!
For anyone wanting to send me mail (and please, please, please do!!), here is my address:
Melissa Berger
US Peace Corps
Private Bag 00243 
Gaborone, Botswana
This address will only be good for a month or two, so look out for updates.  Mail generally takes a few weeks, so if you were to send something today, I would get it sometime around the middle of the month.
Thanks for reading this whole thing if you're still with me, and I promise the packing list soon!

Less than a month to go!

   In less than 30 days, I will be in Botswana!  I got an email today with my staging materials and flight information, and found out that I will be leaving on April 10th instead of the 7th.  Apparently we fly into South Africa from Philadelphia, and where volunteers used to have a 10 hour bus ride from South Africa to Botswana, we will now have a 45 minute plane ride instead.  I know that this should be good news and that a 10 hour bus ride is usually something people would give anything to avoid, but I have to admit, I'm a little disappointed.  I'm not a big fan of flying to begin with, so a second flight is not good news for me, and I was looking forward to looking out of the bus window at my first view of Africa.  Oh well.  Just another reminder to not go into this with any expectations!
   Packing is going slowly, but it's coming along.  I have a pretty solid packing list as well as a shopping list, and I've been able to cross a few things off each.  I'm really just waiting until my non-packing related expenses (car, health, credit card, etc) are figured out before I go on a very large shopping spree to get everything I need.  If anyone is wondering what one brings to Botswana for 27 months, I'll post my packing list once it's final- hopefully soon!
   Everything is moving incredibly fast.  It's a strange feeling that can't quite be described, to know that in 27 days, my life will change so drastically.  I've been doing as much reading as possible, and the group of volunteers already in Botswana have been enormously helpful in giving advice and reassurance, but it doesn't change the fact that I can plan every minute of my life up until that date (and believe me, I have been - I'm running out of days to do everything and see everyone!), but once I get on that plane, all expectations and plans fly out the window.  I guess this could be seen as liberating.  My mom is constantly reminding me of how nice it will be not to worry about keeping up with the expenses and worries of having a car, and while I agree, I also have never experienced life without one.  A lot of people have been asking me specific questions about how I will be living.  "Will you have electricity?  Running water?  Internet?  Will you live in a real house?  How big are the bugs?  What will you eat?  What exactly will your job be?  What are the people like there? Do they like having volunteers there?  Is it safe?" - all good questions, but unfortunately my answers so far are unsatisfying.  Although Botswana is a fairly developed country and most people seem to have electricity, running water, and a "real house," not everyone does, and as a Peace Corps volunteer, I could be placed anywhere.  I have seen pictures of enormous bugs in other volunteers' photos, but I don't know if they're all like that.  I have no idea about the Internet, although it seems that most volunteers either have it in their offices or access it with varying degrees of frequency at nearby internet cafes.  As far as food goes, I don't know too much about it yet.  I get the impression that meals include a lot of starch and chicken or game meat when it's available.  Millet or sorghum porridge is apparently a popular meal, and veggies are available, but not widely eaten.  Yes, some people eat mopane worms.  Will I eat them? ......We'll see.  The last few questions, the ones pertaining to the people of Botswana and their attitude toward volunteers, are the ones that I have the most trouble answering.  For now, all I can say is that Botswana is one of the most stable, peaceful countries in Africa, and I don't have any more concern for my safety there than I would traveling anywhere new to me.
  A couple quick announcements before I sign off.  If you are a teacher of any grade or class type, and you think your class could benefit from correspondence with a Peace Corps  volunteer, ask me about WorldWise Schools.  It's basically a glorified pen-pal connection between a volunteer and a class, but the program also provides some related curriculum ideas and support.  I'm already signed up to work with a friend's class, but I'm sure I could handle more than one, or could pass it off to someone in my group if I find I can't.  Also, the time for collecting addresses of people who want letters from Africa has come.  Email me your home addresses, and I'll be sure to write!
  I think that's about all for today, especially since I have work in a half an hour.  Be on the lookout for a packing list soon!

Aspiration Statement

Sorry for the long entry, but I wanted to post the Peace Corps aspiration statement that I was required to send in to the PC staff in Botswana. This was more difficult to write than I thought it would be, and I have no idea if these are the responses the office is looking for, but it does sum up my intentions and feelings about joining the Peace Corps. I promise to post more exciting and interesting things next time!

A. What are the professional attributes you plans to use, and what aspirations do you hope to fulfill during your Peace Corps service?
Although I may not have the years of professional experience that some other volunteers may have, I believe that I have a lot to offer as a volunteer in the HIV/AIDS Capacity Building Project. Along with my enthusiasm, I bring years of working within the medical field, some clinical experience, and a lifetime of experience in working with children. Even in the United States there is frustration in finding and obtaining resources and care within the health care system. I have experience and training in connecting people with these resources, and I hope to continue to do so in Botswana. After working in a pediatrician’s office, my special field of interest concerns mothers and children, so I am especially pleased to be placed in a project that is based around their care. I have also loved working with children and teens in youth groups and camps, and I hope to have the opportunity to use these experiences in Botswana, perhaps in the areas of support for PWLHA’s, stigma eradication, or girls’ empowerment.

B. What are your strategies for working effectively with host country partners to meet expressed needs?
In reading my Peace Corps materials and the writings of returned and current volunteers, I have come to see that that working effectively within the Peace Corps requires patience, flexibility, persistence, understanding, and a sense of humor. I know that I will not get anywhere by pushing too much too quickly. I plan to spend a lot of time getting to know the local ways of doing business, and listening to the concerns and opinions of the local people. I’m sure that much of the work and concepts of HIV/AIDS education and care will be challenging for the community, but it is much easier to tackle a challenge with a neighbor or friend who respects you than an authoritative stranger.

C. What are your strategies for adapting to a new culture with respect to your own cultural background?
I am excited to begin learning about the people and culture of Botswana, and I believe that the best way to adapt is to dive right in with as much respect and enthusiasm as possible. I did not grow up in a very diverse community, but I have had the opportunity to explore other cultures through travel. In these adventures, I learned quickly that one of the best ways to make a friend in new culture is to attempt to speak with them in their own language. An American asking for directions in French, or ordering a drink in German, or bartering in Turkish at the bazaar is not only a novelty, but a sign of respect. Therefore, I intend to make the most of my Setswana lessons at training. As a further sign of my interest and willingness to live as part of the community, I intend to eat whatever food I am offered, and to take great care to learn and follow the cultural norms of Botswana. I have found that while people are at times suspicious of outsiders, most people are very excited and willing to share their way of life with someone who is genuinely interested. I hope that in proving myself to be that sort of person, I will be accepted and welcomed.


D. What are the skills and knowledge that you hope to gain during pre-service training to best serve your future community and project?
As I have already discussed in the previous section, I am very interested in learning as much Setswana as possible at training. Beyond language, I hope to learn how to live and work effectively in Botswana, from the chores of everyday life to the best way to introduce new programs and new ideas in a new culture. I am interested in learning about the healthcare system of Botswana, as well as the structure of governmental and NGO outreach programs. I hope that training will show me how to find and use the resources I will need to be an effective worker, and the skills to survive and be accepted in my community when I begin service.

E. How do you think Peace Corps service will influence your personal and professional aspirations after your service ends?
This is both the easiest and the most difficult question asked. I would not have joined the Peace Corps if I didn’t have a clear vision of how it would fit into my career plans and personal goals, but as I have not yet lived these experiences, I cannot know how they will actually affect my life. My interest has always been in the field of public health, and I expect that my work in the Peace Corps will help me choose which sector of the field to specialize in, whether it be epidemiology, global health, or maternal/child health. After my service, I plan to pursue a Master’s degree in public health, perhaps through the Peace Corps fellows program. I hope that my experience in Botswana will not only help get me into my educational program, but also give me a starting point for a lifelong career in helping people.
Beyond my personal goals and career aspirations, I know that being a Peace Corps volunteer will almost certainly change the way I view life. Despite family and financial hardships, I know that I have led a relatively comfortable life. In Botswana, I will be working with people who experience disease and loss on a daily basis, but manage to go on living every day. If I aspire to become part of their community, then I also aspire to share in their heartaches. I would not be human if I did not allow this to change me. I will be living more simply than I am used to. From what I have read, I will learn to deal with frustration and lower expectations, but I will also experience joy and pride even in small successes. I expect that this, too, will change the way I live long after I leave Botswana. I have joined the Peace Corps to help others during service and to gain experience to continue helping others throughout my life, but I have the feeling that living as a Peace Corps volunteer in Botswana will also help me become a more mature, socially and globally conscious version of myself.